The ability to survive difficult life situations without lasting impairment.

Stress, crises, strokes of fate.
Sometimes in life, not everything is going as planned or hoped for. However, different people have a different grade, of a sensitive soul. Some are highly sensitive, others are more like unemotional. Some lose their courage after a stroke of fate and become physically and mentally ill, others just seem to continue to live unchanged.
Why is this and how can you learn to handle such situations better?

Resilience is a term from materials science and refers to materials
that after the external action of forces always return to their original form.
In terms of humans, they can be described as internal resistance.

Fundamentals of resilience development

Basically, one can say that social support has a positive effect on resilience. Studies have shown that children who are safely bound to an adult in stress situations emit less of the stress hormone cortisol and thus feel the stress less threatening. In addition, parents can help their children better regulate their feelings.
Basically, it’s about learning that you can handle conflicts, alone or with the help of others.
This realization happens subconsciously and is based on experiences of previous situations that could be overcome.
Therefore it is important to fail and not to shy away from conflicts. Because only by this develops a confidence in itself and its own performance.

Therefore, a good relationship with yourself is one of the most important foundations of resilience development.

Important resilience factors

• Coherence:

  (to see a meaning in life) Those who find life meaningful regain courage more quickly.

• Self-efficacy:

  (The person has experienced that something changes when he acts) This encourages him to look for solutions even in difficult situations.

• Realistic self-image:

  important to recognize what you can possibly do to achieve your goals.

• Dealing with feelings and moods:

  resilient people also allow sadness, rage, and anger but are able to regulate it.

• Optimism:

  according to the motto: it’s hard but it will get better.

• Acceptance:

  what has happened has happened and cannot be repealed.

• Personal responsibility:

  there will be only a change if you do something yourself.

All of these factors help to overcome crises and ultimately grow. Importantly, resilience does not mean that problems should bounce off without touching you. Rather, it means that those affected will not get buried under their problems, but instead be confronted with them despite their vulnerability.

What prevents resilience

The most important discovery of the scientists in the resilience research was:

Regardless of the mental constitution, everyone can increase their ability to resist life crises or stressful situations.

This means that everyone can improve their inner strength regardless of their circumstances. This is also shown, for example, by the fact that children who grow up under bad financial conditions are often more resilient than those with ideal conditions. Because of the handling of stress and other crises can and must also be learned.
Interestingly enough, girls seem to be more resilient, even though they attribute greater vulnerability, emotionality, and emotional lability to them. One reason for this could just be the better handling of one’s own feelings. Here parenting could play an essential role.

Furthermore, intelligence is another factor that contributes to a reflection and analysis of situations, events of experience. Social support can help with this factor, which helps to look at things differently in order to process things better.
In addition to intelligence, the propensity for discipline is a crucial ingredient in resilience development.

Whether in the office or elsewhere – when you have learned to face crises, it is easier to approach new challenges or your own limits.
It is about not being crushed or discouraged by a stressful situation.
But like a young scion who seeks a way to the light through every little gap in the concrete ceiling.